Everyday I practice kindness, meditation and prayer. I am not particularly religious or empathetic like some nun but I find my serenity and peace in those three actions. It is in those moments I often find my answers to life and its importance.
Why should you care about what I do? You shouldn’t, you definitely do not need to as that is a choice. CHOICE. What a word. There are days I hate that word, especially when those around me have absolutely no idea how to practice it. Everyday I am confronted by the challenge of making choices, the right ones of course and yet everyday I meet people or receive emails that share little acknowledgement of the very thing that makes us human, that gives us will power. Yes the will to have power to change our course, to make things right, and have a new start.
I find people are so terrified by this knowledge that they would rather give their power to others or choose not to practice it all. For example staying in a relationship for years even though it’s a mediocre comfort, its safe rather than CHOOSE to be with someone that loves you fully completely or even embrace being single. When I ask people “why don’t you try something different? You’re living half a life! Don’t you want to feel safe and at the same time experience daily passion and love by another?” the sad response is often “This is all I know” or “She knows me its safe” or my favorite “it will be different this time.”
Choosing is not always about standing still and letting the ground swallow you whole. Choosing often means knowing when to let go and set yourself on a different path as frightening as that may seem and as lonely as you may not want to feel. How else would growth happen? How else would you ever learn of love, compassion, trust and friendship? You learn things through change, you learn often through suffering and pain because the discomfort is enough to project you out of the shell or cocoon you have grown to big for.
Please, please my Loves don’t settle. Never settle! Life is short and yes there are many people worth fighting for but there are equally many that need to be set free. You need to surrender your pride and fears and release what has never been yours to begin with. How do you know it’s not yours? Well because nothing is. Everything is an experience that we share with others and the universe.
Live fully and completely. Wake up every morning with the power that today is the day for change to practice happiness and love through decisions and choices you make. Take responsibility for your life and be empowered.
Change. Here is how or at least a start:
- Have faith and jump. Take a leap into the unknown and see what adventure is waiting for you. It might be a new relationship, hobby, job, or moving to another country. Believe in your power and how amazing you are.
- Take care of yourself first. Practice daily rituals that say I love you and it can be as simple as five minutes of deep breathing where you open your lungs and fill your body with the healing power of oxygen (simple right?).
- Be yourself. Yes You. I want to know you and all the weird, crazy, quirky, funny and not so charming things that make you.
- Stop expecting the worst because unfortunately that’s exactly what will happen. Expect the best, that you deserve the best. You might not always get it but it sure as hell beats being anxious all the time waiting for crap to hit you.
- There is no such thing as failure. Yes I said it and you better listen you have never FAILED absolutely NEVER. You could not have because you are learning and that’s how we develop, when a baby is learning to walk and falls do we yell at it call it names and talk down to the baby. No we get excited we start clamping and motivating the child to repeat the action and get better at it. We are excited. Be excited to learn.
- Stop telling me what you don’t want. You’re focusing just on that. Stop and look the other way and tell me what you want. Say it all the time out loud!
- Show up, be accountable, and stay motivated. Always remember “What do I want?”
- Give yourself permission to be happy, free, in love, and even sad. Its okay you have earned it by making it this far!
- Forgive. That does not mean saying its okay how others have hurt you but it does mean letting it go so it can heal.
- Be firm in what you will tolerate. You don’t have to be everyone’s doormat. I will not tolerate abuse of any kind, and that’s final!
- Set goals outside you comfort zone. Reach for the impossible with passion and energy. Stop settling or living like a zombie because it’s all you think you deserve or need.
- Fear. Unless you are being chased by a freaking dinosaur stop letting fear control you and take over your life. Be a warrior there is absolutely nothing to fear because you have no control over the world only the choices you make in the chaos of life (it’s all in your head)!
You are amazing! No one could tell me any different. I don’t care what you have done in your past I only care what you will do with your future. You are amazing! Because out of all the sperm that shot out of your dad you are the one that won the race. You are amazing! Because out of the nine months it takes to create a life you survived. You are amazing! Because you got through childhood and adolescence the hardest stage of development and keep on moving and growing. You are amazing and I want to thank you for your life and presence because without you I wouldn’t be here too because you are my doctor, nurse, waitress, chef, courier, police office, plumber, cashier, banker, a person I share space with.
You are amazing and I need you so transform into who you want to be so you can share that feeling of how amazing you are with me.
Alex Karydi~The Lesbian Guru