From the Book Jacket (Published 1984):
Who are the men that comprise the estimated two-and-a-half-million male couples in America today? What are their backgrounds? What kind of jobs and professions are they in? What are their daily lives like?
In this groundbreaking study, psychiatrist David McWhirter and psychologist Andrew Mattison investigate these questions and dispel popular misconceptions about this increasingly visible minority. Moreover, they provide members of the gay community with a framework for greater self-knowledge. A male couple themselves, Drs. McWhirter and Mattison conducted scores of in-depth personal interviews with male couples whose relationships have lasted anywhere from one to thirty-seven years.
While the study is thoroughly documented and soundly objective, it is also engagingly anecdotal. The men themselves talk about their loves, their hates, their fears and their dreams. They discuss their family lives, early relationships (and, in some instances, marriages), what it’s like to hide one’s sexual identity as well as what it’s like to “come out”.
Through repeated interviews over a five-year period, the authors were able to observe firsthand how relationships between two men develop. Their work not only answers questions but also builds the foundation for a fascinating new theory of gay male relationships. Regardless of individual differences, almost all of the couples in the study went through distinct stages or “passages” over time. THE MALE COUPLE is the first book to identify and describe each of theses 6 stages and to document the unique measures male couples take to stay together. It explores these vital issues and more:
Who provides for whom? Who nurtures whom? How do two men – lacking traditional male/female roles to fall back on – establish balance and harmony emotionally and financially?
How does the absence of sexual exclusivity affect male relationships? What guidelines do men set up to keep outside sex from interfering with their relationships?
How do gay fathers integrate their children into their new lives? What do male couple do when their parents come to visit? How do they create extended families with gay and straight people?
How do two men solve issues of competitiveness and anger? What happens when they go through midlife crises together . . . . grow old together?
How do gay men meet each other? When and how do they symbolize their commitment without the institution of marriage?
While heterosexual couples live with some expectation that their relationships will last “until death us do part,” gay couples often wonder if their relationships will survive beyond a few years. THE MALE COUPLE now proves that men can and do stay together and evaluating the stories of these men, Drs. McWhirter and Mattison fill a large gap, discredit myths, and supply a fresh perspective on the trials and triumphs of human relationships in general.
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