The counsellor said my same-sex feelings were probably because I had been raped by a girl or a woman when I was a little boy. I was seeing the counsellor for depression. Instead, he introduced me to conversion therapy and gave me tablets which he said would replace my attraction to other men with disgust. I was so traumatised.
I developed anxiety because I felt I was not loved and being gay was a sin or a curse. Sometimes I kept away from other gay people so that I would get healed. I felt trapped because I kept moving between accepting myself and also trying to get healed.
I was 22 and in my first year of university, but my mental health deteriorated, affecting my relationship with my lecturers and classmates. I dropped out of school.
Luckily, I got a good clinical psychologist who is now helping me change the effects of the earlier meds I had been given to change my sexuality.
I got help, but I need others to get the same chance as I did.

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